Brunching on coconut creams and shuttlecocks

Someday I hope to be known --
like the noble baboon --

for my large,
razor sharp fangs
and colorful buttocks.

I want to hear people say.

"He certainly has
strikingly vibrant
ass-cheeks,
but he'll flay you
with his fangs
if you cross him."

Not that I'd actually
flay anyone.
I'd probably just
use my fangs
to open beer cans
and make indentations in the soil
for planting pumpkin seeds.

arrrggh

so
I found
star wars legos
here
but
they dont
got
no stormtroopers
I want
lego stormtroopers

I want a bucketful of
lego stormtroopers
that I can
toss to children
from a parade float

I want to line them up
and bowl pokeballs at them

but there are
none

what do I get instead

stinkin endor forest troopers
on their stinkin speeder bikes

they're reasonably decent interpretations
yes
but who wants
a decent interpretation of
someone who can get
beaten up by an ewok?