O' brother where art thou

[plural]

my brother called me yesterday
some of you understand the significance of this
but for the others
my brother and I have had a gulf between us for years
it isn't a void created out of anger
but unease and discomfort

I honestly can not recall
the last time my brother telephoned me

for the most part
there has just been a lack of communication
between us

well he wanted to change that
as a start just to begin talking again
keeping each other informed of our lives

It was a good and needed talk

now

neither of us expects
to become great friends
more that the condition of discomfort
which ruled our interactions
has been deemed unacceptable

at the very least
we should be able to interact
without undue pain and suffering

I was touched by the call
and more so by the conversation we had

it left me feeling rather fragile
like when you bump a wound
you had forgotten you had
and it starts throbbing anew

but in a better way

it was like a huge denial
was lifted off my shoulders

by our mutual acknowledgement
that our relationship was fucked
and a desire on both parts
to begin improving it
in whatever ways are to come

I could stop pretending that it didn't hurt
that it was okay
how things were

and I am still processing
how I feel
but
it hurts a little
feels good a little

just stirred up a lot of emotional shit
but for that

I am glad

Comments

[plural.livejournal.com]

it is indeed

yeah

that is one thing I have to say for my family

whatever their faults, they really try to keep improving and working on themselves

makes it a lot easier to forgive the little slights
imho

[zaiah.livejournal.com]

Or that perhaps, for their fucked up ways, they allow each generation to be a springboard for the next to allow for improvement and an honest intention to better their clan....