plural: (Default)
plural ([personal profile] plural) wrote2003-07-10 04:03 pm

For Buffy

Moshe is a devout but monetarily poor jew
his daughter is to be married
and he has no money to give for her dowry

so he prays to the lord

"please lord let me win the lottery so that I can give my daughter something for her dowry"

a week goes by
he doesnt win the lottery

so he tries again

"please lord let me win the lottery so that I can give my daughter something for her dowry"

another week passes
and again he doesnt win

at this point he is a little frustrated

and so he looks up at the heavens and calls out to god

"God, I dont understand it, all my life I have tried to be a good pious jew
I have always been satisfied with what you have provided for me
and never asked you for anything

now this once, I ask you, not for myself but for my daughter
and you turn your back on me?"

the sky darkens
and the heavens part
and a voice booms out

"Moshe, at least meet me halfway, buy a fucking ticket!"

[identity profile] ikilled007.livejournal.com 2003-07-10 01:02 pm (UTC)(link)
It's not fair -- he should drop the ticket from heaven.

[identity profile] plural.livejournal.com 2003-07-10 01:08 pm (UTC)(link)
look
you want to win a 250 million dollar pot

you have buy a ticket

that just how it works man

as I said to your forefathers many years ago,

I only help those who help themselves

I would have been happy to have you win the lottery, but rules are rules

I already have the pope on my ass for letting you do that threesome with the olson twins...

[identity profile] zaiah.livejournal.com 2003-07-10 02:10 pm (UTC)(link)
*fits of giggles*