Humourous forward

[plural]

Saddam Hussein and his chauffeur were rolling down the highway when suddenly they hit a pig crossing the road. They kill it instantly.

Saddam tells his driver: "Go to da farm over dere and hexplain to da honer of da pig what appened."

One hour later, Saddam sees his driver coming back from the farm, his clothes all wrinkled, a bottle of wine in one hand and a cigar in the other.

"What appen to you?" he asks. "Well, the farmer gave me a bottle of wine, his wife, the cigar and their 19 year old daughter made wild passionate love to me."

"My God! What did you tell dem?" asked President Hussein. The driver answered:

"Good evening, I am Saddam Hussein's chauffeur and I have just killed the pig."

Comments

[thawaltzingfool.livejournal.com]

hahaha!

[ipsafictura.livejournal.com]

You asked for a note when people added you, consider this my note. Please don't feel obligated to add me, I've always thought that was a bit silly.

On a side note, I used to have an old joke book that had this same joke with Hitler as the subject.

Re:

[plural.livejournal.com]

well hello there and welcome, I notice you come highly recommended so I have added you back, I am assuming you either also despise the french or thought my assertion that we should bomb them humourous to look further *grin*

yeah I always found the obligation part of lj friends list sort of ridiculous, I tend to add/remove people at whimsy and as often as not when I remove someone, I add em back later.

far too many people treat friend list with too much drama, it isnt like your girlfriend just tried to kiss you [too sooth your feelings] after you walked in on her tossing your best friends salad, its a fucking journal fer chris'sake

you probably havent noticed yet, but I have a strange sense of humour, it is in fact illegal in seven states, so if you come from utah, new jersey, ohio, mississippi, new hampshire, montana or alabama, I will have to politely request that you refrain from laughing in accordance with your local laws.

thank you, welcome and have a swell day

Re:

[ipsafictura.livejournal.com]

I'm in California where one can laugh at anything as long as you don't momentarily consider yourself personally responsible for your own health and safety.

As it happens I'm a fan of the french, which is to say the french people and culture, not so much the french government. I prefer to populate my friends list with entertaining and sharp people who disagree with me, makes my day more interesting.

What really won me over was the ettiquette guide for dealing with protestors.

[plural.livejournal.com]

yeah I am a big fan of punching people in the nose as a form of enlightenment. god only knows what sort of smart ass punk I would be if I hadnt gotten a few well deserved smacks to my noggin as a child...

*grin*

Re:

[ipsafictura.livejournal.com]

Here in the bay area we're up to our ears in protestors. While I believe that protest has a certain amount of power to raise awareness of an issue, I don't think it convinces politicians or actually changes the world. I don't want to disillusion all those nice baby boomers who think that they personally stopped the Vietnam war, but they've gotten thoroughly unreasonable since then.

[plural.livejournal.com]

if it was not already inevitiable that bush is getting reelected I would argue that they are just helping him do so.

what the protestors have accomplished is to so marginalize the left that we are going to be lockstepping with the conservatives for years to come.

I am not one who believes we should all toe the line with the majority, but if you want people to listen to your protests you have to make them identify with you as a person simular to them, otherwise it is too easy to write them off as goddamn hippies which is what has happened.

Re:

[ipsafictura.livejournal.com]

I'm actually not giving the inevitable vote to Bush. I'd say it's nearly inevitable and there certainly isn't a strong candidate to defeat him. Still, the American public needs instant gratification, if Iraq drags on to long and doesn't produce the kind of results that people understand and see as substantial the people could very easily turn on him. Many people hold him to blame for the recent surge in anti-Americanism around the globe, and if that gets worse or is more widely reported in the US it could do him signifigant damage.

People who are inclined to protest are people who believe that not only is their view morally superior, but in fact they are morally superior as well. When you start thinking of yourself as better it seems reasonable to be really condescending and even inflammatory to people who disagree. It's a kind of short-sightedness that's even worse than the gung-ho chomping at the bit, bomb everyone crowd. The sad fact is that most protestors have little to no interest in convincing anyone or representing their ideals, mostly they just want to show off how conscientious they are and yell at the people they perceive as the enemy.

[plural.livejournal.com]

nah, it is inevitable even if the dems could get a candidate worth urinating on.

its pretty simple, we will win the war, it doesnt matter if it takes six weeks or six months, it will be well won before the election, the aftermath however will be too short to give any opponents justifiable criticism on the sucess or failure of the rebuilding, so bush gets a freebie as the winner of the war.

Next bush starts pumping out iraqi oil to fund the provisional government and help provide humanitarian aid to the iraqi people, this has the "entirely unintended consequence" *grin* of dropping oil price from 25-30 dollars a barrell range to the 15 dollar range. The american economy is built on cheap oil, significant drops in oil prices have always resulted in large improvement to our economic wellbeing. If bush can half the price it costs companys to produce and transport goods, and the cost to consumer to heat and light their homes it will pump massive amount of cash into the economy, and hello jumpstart.

OPEC will protest but seeing as the average OPEC nation produces oil between 2-4 dollars a barrel they wont whine too much, especially since they would have to almost entirely shut down production to counter the effect of iraqi oil being flooded onto the market. Only a very select few of the OPEC membership can afford the hit to their economy that not receiving oil revenues would bring, Saudi could go maybe 6-12 month, while Venezuela could barely manage 3 months.

any president who can stack a win in both the economic and military catagories has pretty much a blank check with the majority of the american people. In fact it will take a serious screwup on bush's part (or congress's) to even wrest the control of both houses from the republicans. I think right now Ashcroft is probably the biggest threat to republican control of congress (but not to bush's relection), and only then if he sends Patriot 2 to congress before the election which I doubt he will do.

as for protestors, I entirely agree with your comments, which is part of the reason why even when I agree with them in part, I have little patience for their ramblings.

Re:

[ipsafictura.livejournal.com]

Ashcroft is probably the largest threat to nearly everything he comes in contact with, even fluffy bunnies. That not withstanding, I have to acknowledge the posibility that Iraq takes longer than we expected. It also depends on what Bush decides to do after Iraq. If he pumps humanitarian aid into Iraq, starts mouthing some stuff about education and health care and makes it clear he's ready to chill out a bit he'll be fine. If he goes running off after a new threat(except Kim Jong Il, I think the American Public would follow him for that), continues to let his posse jack up civil liberties, and keeps up the doom and gloom tale he might be in trouble. The unflinching sense of American invulnerability has been pretty seriously damaged, Bush needs to show the public that we can relax and that the terrorists aren't going to come eat our babies. If he doesn't do some work on the sense of safety that we clearly value more highly than freedom they're eventually going to start holding him responsible. Chances are decent that the backlash wont start until after his second term though. I give him an 85% percent chance of re-election, but only a 40% chance of being remembered well in 20 years.

[plural.livejournal.com]

I would boost reelection into the low ninetys but agree with you on histories reflection of him, unless of course ashcroft gets his way, then once bush's third term starts school children will be issued jackboots and notepads to monitor their parents activities