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Mar. 21st, 2003 12:23 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
pluralA brief clarification in response to several of the comments made:
Lest I have given the wrong impression in my last post.
Marriage is absolutely not entirely about sex
However a marriage without sex, passion and other forms of physical intimacy is hardly a marriage
When I was sixteen, I was sneaking into a friends house late one evening, as we crept through the living room, we discovered his parents, half naked and making out like a pair of, well sixteen year olds, my friend was mortified at the sight, but to me it was different. When I have been married twenty years as they had, I want, need and will insist upon that level of passion, interest and love, I can not see accepting less, when I know such is possible.
I was lucky enough in my youth to find such a woman, to love her and more importantly for her to love me, I asked her to marry me after a relatively brief courtship, and she accepted. Unfortunately a short time later, she was taken from me in a boating accident.
For many years, I wandered from brief relationship to brief relationship, for the most part I would be so bored with a woman after a month or so that I lacked even the desire to fuck her. I thought on this and was worried, I could not settle for less than I had seen, but to that point had found nothing else which could even imitate it poorly, was I destined to be without such? Had I been given my chance at such love and had it taken from me?
Then a few years back, I dated a girl, for nearly three years we dated, and everyday we made love. After three years, I was still full of the same passion, lust and need for her that I felt on our first date, when I came home I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and devour her.
While that relationship did not last for a variety of reasons, the lesson I learned and more importantly the hope that it provides will remain with me always. I will never accept a passionless marriage, I insist upon passion whether physical, emotional or intellectual, I refuse to accept less than the most it can be.
Lest I have given the wrong impression in my last post.
Marriage is absolutely not entirely about sex
However a marriage without sex, passion and other forms of physical intimacy is hardly a marriage
When I was sixteen, I was sneaking into a friends house late one evening, as we crept through the living room, we discovered his parents, half naked and making out like a pair of, well sixteen year olds, my friend was mortified at the sight, but to me it was different. When I have been married twenty years as they had, I want, need and will insist upon that level of passion, interest and love, I can not see accepting less, when I know such is possible.
I was lucky enough in my youth to find such a woman, to love her and more importantly for her to love me, I asked her to marry me after a relatively brief courtship, and she accepted. Unfortunately a short time later, she was taken from me in a boating accident.
For many years, I wandered from brief relationship to brief relationship, for the most part I would be so bored with a woman after a month or so that I lacked even the desire to fuck her. I thought on this and was worried, I could not settle for less than I had seen, but to that point had found nothing else which could even imitate it poorly, was I destined to be without such? Had I been given my chance at such love and had it taken from me?
Then a few years back, I dated a girl, for nearly three years we dated, and everyday we made love. After three years, I was still full of the same passion, lust and need for her that I felt on our first date, when I came home I wanted nothing more than to take her in my arms and devour her.
While that relationship did not last for a variety of reasons, the lesson I learned and more importantly the hope that it provides will remain with me always. I will never accept a passionless marriage, I insist upon passion whether physical, emotional or intellectual, I refuse to accept less than the most it can be.
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I will never accept a passionless marriage...
Date: 2003-03-21 01:27 am (UTC)suffice to say, ditto.
no subject
Date: 2003-03-21 06:21 am (UTC)also, i'm right there with you on the sex thing...i hear so many men around my office complain that their wives don't want to have sex anymore and i JUST DON'T UNDERSTAND....
everytime i'm with eduardo i leave sore and weighing less *wink*
no subject
Date: 2003-03-21 06:37 am (UTC)As for passionless marriages. I have been separated from my husband for almost 2 years now. One of the reasons I left him was the lack of passion, he had it for me, I didnt have it for him. There are of course other larger reasons why I left, but that one was important as well.
I refuse to ever be involved in anything long term again where I do not want to eat the man alive, physically and mentally. Like I always say...fuck my mind and my body. I want to be in something where on the best days I cant get enough stimulation in every arena from that person and I want them to feel the same for me. I found this man last year, but it hasnt worked out and I'm crossing my fingers that I can, once again, find it in someone else.
I'm too passionate a person to not have it.
no subject
Date: 2003-03-22 12:59 am (UTC)