plural: (who me)
[personal profile] plural
If you are stupid, liberal, french or of delicate fucking sensibilities
you had better just stop reading this right about here.

I am halting temporarily the war on terrorism

fuck the terrorists, the little attention whores can wait

There is a more pressing need

from here out it is all out war on stupid people and france
then we can deal with any terrorist smart enough to have survived the war on stupid people
which I do not think will be very many

I hate stupid fucking people and I hate france

I have evidence which inexorably links the nation of france to stupid people
[no, that isn't my handwriting]
[of course I didn't just make this stuff up]
[ah hell, if its good enough for bush, why not me]

on that note
I have to give credit to arafat
listen up folks cause this is probably the only praise for that old bag of putrid camel spit
you will ever hear from me

The man knows how to deal with stupid motherfuckers

how you might ask?
it is brilliantly simple
he convinces them to strap large amounts of explosives to their bodies
and blow their stupid asses to kingdom come

now I would have more support for the idea
if he wasnt killing lots of civilians at the same time
but I figure he must be a realist
getting rid of stupid people has a cost
if some innocent people have to die
to get rid of the stupid people it is probably worth it
especially since chances are better than not
that some of those dying are also stupid motherfuckers
the lucky bastard gets the best of both worlds

that said

I am going back to my secret laboratory
and going to spend the next several weeks
advancing my research on making stupidity painful

I am almost at the human trial phase now
so soon I will have to start abducting stupid people
to test my theories

which means I need a shit load of christmas lights and tinfoil to construct my flying saucer
so I can whisk them out of trailer parks without anyone besides the national enquirer giving a damn

if you are a stupid person and do not wish to be abducted by me
and subjected to painful and humiliating experiments
fold a piece of tinfoil into a long band and tie it around your forehead
make sure you put the shiny side facing outward to increase visibility

this will identify you as a fucking moron
but I will honor it because at least then in my normal day to day life
I can identify you from quite a distance and avoid you

it is sort of a you scratch my back
I wont scratch yours

otherwise god only knows what my sadistic laboratory assistant
will do to you, especially if you are cute
he doesn't get out much and well
even misshapen sadistic lab assistants need love
and trust me,
you do not want to be on the recieving end of that particular equation

Date: 2002-09-27 02:57 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zaiah.livejournal.com
Stupid people fucking.. now that really IS an amuzing sight to behold.

Date: 2002-09-27 02:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hiraya.livejournal.com
Mon dieu. je me rire. ;)

Date: 2002-09-27 03:02 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
yeah yeah
that first part will be said
quite a bit in french soon enough
but with a very different inflection
and
for the second part
I
doubt there will be much laughing involved

muhahahahahhahahahahhahahhaaaaaaa

*winkwinknudgenudge*

Date: 2002-09-27 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] asrei.livejournal.com
*purr*
M'dear man, i work for TVSN.

I wish you knew the pain that is
being a sales rep for a home shopping
channel during christmas *sigh*

pity me - i get paid very little
and have to scrape the gene pool
to get two nurons to rub together

=/

Date: 2002-09-27 05:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zombiegirl.livejournal.com
ahh it's strange i've always thought stupidty was linked to the UK and the USA...must be a cultural difference then.

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