(no subject)

I have
returned
you may
recommence
your lives

[but]
[I deeply]
[appreciate the]
[quintillionth of a second]
[pause you honored me]
[with]
*smirk*

anyway
vacation was good
think I need to
find a way
to make it permanent
or
something
anyway
I have
some rants
about familial
relations and
what not
to bore you all with

so
I will just say
that
I
missed ya all

strangers by blood ... or ... the death of the american family

my family
like many others
has
a past both
sordid and genteel

spending seven days
with twenty-seven members
of my family
definatly biased my
thinking towards the
former.

the overwhelming conclusion
I came to observing
the various interactions
of various sorts between
various people

was that
we had a group
of twenty seven people
who at the very least
shared one common trait

a trait which oddly
was no where present
during this gathering

All of these people
are professionals
in one way or another

granted professionalism
is easy when
you know
that your dinner
isnt dependant on
your continued employment.

Why is it that
we often treat
strangers with more
respect and dignity
than we treat our
families.

One of my aunts
once said.

"The nice thing about family is that you can be completely honest"

I think thats a load of crap,

People arent honest with family
they are careless

saying anything you want
is quite different
than speaking honestly

for all the talk of searching
for the grace of honesty
the supply will be perpetually
in excess of the demand

We dont want
honesty and truth

the truth is we
all know the truth

you dont suddenly realize
that you have a problem
you suddenly
admit
that you have a problem

and no one truely
want the truth
which they work so
hard to avoid
shoved in their face.

most people
are not honest
with their families
in any way
and
I am
no different

we dont tell
them the honest
truth we couch it
perhaps each
in our own way
for various motivations

but mostly
we say or hurt each other
out of carelessness

you
are more capable
of being hurtful
to your family
than
any other people
because you
know their faults
every fissure
in their character

and
in my opinion
it is incumbent on you
to take care
with words and
actions
to nuture those wounds
and not to
strike them.

I attempt
to couch
i.e. be dishonest
with my family
in a particular way

I know their
weakness and
when something needs
to be addressed
rather than striking
brutally with my exposed
and unguarded view
of their failings
to
approach them
in such a way
that they can
hear my concerns
without feeling
attacked
and wounded.

I fail at this
continuously

so without
any true conclusions
I simply ask of you

why is it
that we do not
extend the same
common courtesies
to our families as
we
do
to
strangers
on the
street?

In favor of dueling ... or ... the death of civility

I have
been often thinking
of the
putrid state
of social interactions
among members of
our society

and
I propose
the following
solution

I think we should
create a process
by which we can
use mortal combat

[a duel if you will]

to resolve differences.

Perhaps you will
argue that this is
a step back for
civilization
but hear me out.

I am proposing
the use of
bladed weapons
through a ritualistic
process by which
one can address grievances
on a limited basis by severity.

[perhaps]
[using hand to hand]
[for less severe grievances]

why?

I feel the strongest
force behind the
lack of social etiquette
is
simple laziness

laziness stems from
a lack of motivating
consequences.

In our society
we have set the
value for civility
so low as to
remove all consequences
for acts of incivility.

[with the]
[exception of]
[so called civility]
[laws which primarily]
[persecute the less]
[fortunate]

if we look to
history
when such resolutions
we both permitted and
frequent

how much more carefully
were words chosen
and
insults when
hurled with much
more dramatic calculation.

personally
I think
the decrease in
civility has also lead
to a decrease in the
quality and substance
of incivility.

perhaps I am
just an aesthete
but I mourn the
loss of the
charming intellectual
insult
having been replaced
with the crude jerky finger
and banal epithets.

I know
I would be much more
careful to properly
acknowledge and
show each person
basic respect and
accord to each
human dignity
if I knew my actions
could end up
with physical consequences

As a child
I had a concept
in my head
a rule if you will

I would only
allow those into
my inner circle
those whom
had received at
the hands of fate
physical retribution
for their unwise actions

for all others I felt
were simply untrustworthy

I found that a child
who had not gotten

[excuse the vernacular]

their ass whipped
for being a
snot nose punk

[because]
[we all have]
[at one time or another]
[been a snot nosed punk]

tended to have
dramatically less respect
for persons and property
than those who had

I know for myself
the day I took my first
real beating
was the day
I understood the
meaning of consequences

truly understood

going without dinner
is not a consequence of
much weight
sure it may suck
but
does it really deter you?

no

spending twenty minutes
stuffing toilet paper up
my still bleeding nose
and holding ice to my
swollen face

for the first time
in my life
I truly regretted
spouting my mouth off
and
resolved to be
more careful with
my words.

now
I want to pause to
clarify something

I do not support
bullying nor do I
think random or vindictive
beatings are productive.

[at least not in the scope]
[of this discussion]
[as all things are]
[inherently productive]
[the question is more]
[what do they produce?]

in this
particular case
I had asked for...
was deserving of...
and desperately needed...
the beating I took

as such
it was a
valuable learning
lesson for me.

of course
I was a
particularly dense
child and had to
learn that particular
lesson several times
but
it does not
lessen the impact
of the first teaching

any way
I have digressed

I think we need
to institute
some form of
extremely personal
consequences for
actions which
are thoughtless
lazy and rude.

how many times
have you wished you
could punch some jerk
in the face

regardless if it would
resolve the issue or
not
just simply because
it would feel good.

how would you
act if you knew
that someone else
could simply do that?

would you be more careful if your words could directly cause you pain?

my theory is
that you would
but
you
tell me.