plural: (maltese)
[personal profile] plural
so upon
returning from
my
evenings rendezvous
posting
ever so briefly

i was about to retire
when
i
was engaged in
a most delightful
conversation

my spanish
is as you well know
miserable
and
my companions english
was only slightly better

but with some effort
we talked of many things

and
polished off
most of a bottle
of
rum
which i
of course
convienently
had located in
my hotel room

we talked for
several hours
breaking only
when the sun
was risen

it raised many questions
and
now that i am

[mostly]

sober

i have been thinking
[danger will robinson]

the question
which i will pose
while i continue to deliberate
is

what is a good man?

Date: 2002-03-28 07:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] so-alone.livejournal.com
their is not a damn good man left i tell you.

Date: 2002-03-28 08:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damion.livejournal.com
One who loves everyone, but who doesn't need everyone to love him back.

Date: 2002-03-28 08:44 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sickboy.livejournal.com
I would say that a good man is someone who can at the end of his days honestly say that he has admitted his mistakes and learned from them and has always done his best to take into consideration the feelings of others and the consequences of his actions. Someone that can lay his head at night and sleep well knowing he hasn't made this world of ours a worse place and often enough has contributed to making it a better place by even the simplest of actions.
I don't believe that someone needs to perform great services to mankind by dedicating their lives to wiping out famine or greed. It's the little things that can certainly count like something as simple as holding doors open for someone or a pleasant smile now and then.

That's just the way I see it.

Date: 2002-03-28 09:37 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
The only good man is a dead man.

::cough::

Date: 2002-03-28 10:10 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
while my
endless cynicism
goads me to agree
most heartily

i wonder dear

of all the corpses in the world
which
do
you prefer?

Date: 2002-03-28 10:16 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
*ponders*

Val Kilmer, or Owen Wilson. Or my ex.

Date: 2002-03-28 10:24 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
and what
is it about them
that
you prefer
above the countless others

if i may pry?

Date: 2002-03-28 10:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
Val Kilmer and Owen Wilson are blonde and skinny. My ex is skinny and desirable in many ways, though not blonde.

Date: 2002-03-28 10:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
hmm
and that
is
your measure of worth?

blonde and skinny

why does that
amuses me
ever so slightly

Date: 2002-03-28 10:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
My measures of worth have to do more with personality. But if we're discussing corpses, personality is hardly relevant. :)

touche

Date: 2002-03-28 10:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
so
what
measures up
in your eyes
in
terms of
personality

Re: touche

Date: 2002-03-28 10:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
Well, my experiences have suggested that there are essentially three kinds of men:

1) Think I'm a goddess. Never question anything I say or do.

2) Think I'm a whore. Never give the time of day to anything I say or do.

What I like in a man (or a woman) is someone who respects me for my virtues, sees my failings for what they are rather than not out of proportion in either direction, and likes me anyway.

I'll do the same for them.


How's that, hmm?
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com


not to sound
condescending
for i mean it quite the opposite
but
it was actually a better answer
than i had hoped for

the madonna/whore complex
so many men have is
excessively trite and
lacks any amusing quality

but i would wager
that love takes you
one step further

it is not enough to love and respect
someone for their virtues
and accept or tolerate their failings

love is to cherish
their failings
for it is those failings
which make them human

that which distinguishes us
from the countless masses
those foibles which make us
special and unique

those dark secrets
hidden deep among
our skeletons
which we share
only with those
closest to us
those who face our monsters
beside us
and think more of us for them
not less

i wish you well
in your quest for that third type
that you may be
both queen and whore
to your hearts content
and
never be limited to
either
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
What can I say to that? Thank you, and it's good to know someone sees it the way I wish everyone saw it.
From: [identity profile] city-glitter.livejournal.com
I'm so smart. I just realized I didn't say what the third kind of man is.

The third kind of man is what I said I liked, but forgot to put "3)" in front of.

Date: 2002-03-29 03:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
mmm
to each their own
how absolutely boring
would it be
if
we all saw
the world
the same way

there are many truths
and many fictions

some we tell ourselves
some we tell others

all that seperates
the truths from the fictions
is
belief

what you believe
is
true

nothing more
nothing less

Date: 2002-03-29 09:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ravengirl.livejournal.com
a good man is hard to find...
wait a minute,
there's one in my bed!
how'd he get there?!
"good"
must be defined
firstly

Date: 2002-03-29 02:55 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
then begin

what is good?

Date: 2002-03-31 11:13 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] msconnecticut.livejournal.com
The more I read, the more I am intrigued!
M~

Date: 2002-03-31 08:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] suzvon.livejournal.com
Well, I don't like the term "good" because that, in itself, is a judgment. However, I'm going to change the term to a "complete" man and take liberty.

A complete man, like a complete woman, is a man who loves and is true to himself. And the desire to have a complete (this is where I think people think of the term, "good") man is the desire to have someone who makes you feel they are loving you completely, as you are. For, through self love, unconditional love is possible. Unconditional love comes with no judgment.

Think about the people you really like and you will find at least one of the stronger elements...and a requirement, is that they appear to like you. The people in your life who like you, but...are the ones who you also have trouble loving unconditionally because you like them, but...if they would only stop judging you.

please.... take any liberty you like

Date: 2002-04-01 12:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] plural.livejournal.com
you replace the word
good
with complete
because it was a judgment
which i do agree
and incidentally was what I was asking for
also
is complete not a judgment as well?

in who?s eyes is he complete?

...

"...is a man who loves and is true to himself..."

a question
you speak these words as if
being true to ones self is always a positive thing

what if you are a shit
then should you be true to yourself
and continue to act like a shit?

I completely agree with you that
the path to true love lies within self love

if we do not love ourselves
we are unable to love others
or allow them to love us

i disagree however that unconditional love
comes without judgment

quite the opposite
unconditional love requires judgment
otherwise you are just glossing over
a persons flaws and weaknesses

unconditional loves requires knowing
understanding and valuing a persons flaws

this requires judgment

everyone that i love
i love unconditionally

i love them not in spite of their flaws
but because of them
for it is their flaws that make them human

i still love
every ex girlfriend
every ex friend
whom i have ever loved

and as long as it was healthy
for us to remain in whatever relationship
we had
i did so
when it was no longer
so was the relationship

this was a recognition of reality
not a judgment on my part

far too often relationships
drag on in suffering
and blind you with pain
so that you can no longer see
the beauty and joy which caused you to love them in the first place

how often do you hear
"I don't know what i saw in them"

anytime you do
people refused to accept and realize
that the relationship wasn't healthy
and continued to hurt each other
until exactly that happened
they couldn't remember why they fell in love

life is full of pain and suffering
all that makes it worth while
are those too few moments
moments
when we share joy and love
with those we care about
be the friends or lovers

to throw this all away
because you were blinded by fear
or desperation to force something that wasn't healthy
seems tragic

you seem to have an aversion to judgment
but i think it is more likely that your
aversion is not to judgment
but to people who are
condescending and unfair
in their judgments

and most of all
people who reserve their love
based on their judgments

Date: 2002-04-01 12:43 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] kingnixon.livejournal.com
damn. i'm halfway there..
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