Lesson in odds and numbers

[plural]

[from special contributing writer]
[against my better judgment]

driving to work today
I observed a female driver
cut right in front of a pickup truck
causing him to have to drive
on to the shoulder to avoid hitting her.

This evidently angered the driver enough
that he hung his arm out his window
and flipped the woman off.

"Man, that guy is stupid"

I thought to myself.
I always smile nicely
and wave in a sheepish manner
whenever a female does anything
to me in traffic and here's why:

I drive 49 miles each way
every day to work,
that's 98 miles each day.
Of these,
16 miles each way
is bumper-to-bumper traffic.
Most of the bumper-to-bumper is on an 8 lane highway
so if you just look at the 7 lanes I am not in,
that means I pass a new car every 40 feet per lane.
Even though the rest of the 32 miles is not bumper to bumper,
I figure I pass at least another 4000 cars.
That brings the number to 36,000 cars I pass every day.

Statistically,
half of these are driven by females or 18,000.

In any given group of females 1 in 28 are having the worst day of their period.
That's 642.

According to Cosmopolitan,
70% describe their love life as dissatisfying or unrewarding.
That's 449.

According to the National Institute of Health,
22% of all females have seriously considered suicide or homicide.
That's 98.

And 34% describe men as their biggest problem.
That's 33.

According to the National Rifle Association
5% of all females carry weapons
and this number is increasing.

That means that
every single day,
I drive past
at least one
female that has a lousy love life,
thinks men are her biggest problem,
has seriously considered suicide or homicide,
is having the worst day of her period,
and is armed with a lethal weapon.

Flip one off?

I think not.

Comments

Heh.

[zaiah.livejournal.com]

T'would be much better to lean out the window And Yell.. "Yes I Know You're Fat!!!" ?? --> :)

*just curious*