unpolished lives of mere mortals

[plural]

So
I decided to start forcing myself
to slack on certain things
in the interest
of giving myself a break

for example

I have decided not to return the movies I rented
until they are at least two weeks overdue

and

I am going to eat in restaurants 7 nights a week
instead of my usual 6

and

I am going to have the maid come
for two hours 5 days a week
instead of
one hour on four

and lastly

all sexual activities
shall be performed
in the wom[a/e]n on top positions

thank you

that is all