The grinch

all right all you Christian type peoples
I have about had enough

we had a deal
as long as you kept the movie theaters and Chinese restaurants opens
I could abide by this silly little holiday of yours

well as they say
give a fucker a mile and he'll take the last inch too

I cannot believe this godforsaken city
where they cant even allow me my traditional little Jewish Christmas

is it too much to ask, that I be able to eat some tasty Chinese food
and saunter down to the local cinema for a nice vapid Hollywood movie
before heading home because every other god forsaken place is closed?

ah hell, I am not picky give me anything from the same continent
I know you fuckers cant tell the difference between "those" people anyway
but no, there ain't a damn place serving anything resembling food
[and while I am on the subject of food]
[cause I was subjected to gastronomical ignominy tonight]
[DiGorno, it ain't just like delivery]
[it is a lot more like fucking DisGusting]

and the movie theaters, well the last movies showing were at 6:30pm

so I suppose I could have had a late lunch and a movie
and then twiddled my goddamn thumbs all night
the neighbors Christmas carols being shoved down my throat

Christmas carols are Satan
no one else could devise something so insidious
every notice that however loud you turn up your stereo
that flippant gay ass melody just seeps on through

so I say to you

BAH Humbug

by which of course I mean

Merry Christmas to you all, and have a good night

[as long as you don't live above me]
[cause I am gonna be ventilating your]
["no purple and pink Christmas lights aren't tacky"]
[ass in about twelve seconds with a .45]
[if you don't turn that shit down to an ignorable volume]