plural: (king)
taking my little sister
and a gaggle of her friends
out for her 21st birthday

Dinner at her favorite restaurant
And I've arranged for a VIP table
At a swanky club downtown

Being the only guy
In a gaggle of 21 year old girls
Is rough but I'll manage

It remains good to be the king
Even if I'd rather have the juice
And the squeeze
plural: (solitary)


be gentle

be kind

make it easy


turn and walk away

it is what I do best

and I hate myself for it


it makes sense


i understand it



i wish i understood less

it would be easier

i think





like now

i get sand.
plural: (Default)

Your result for The (Federal Reserve's) Financial Literacy Test...

Personal Finance Expert

You answered 31/31 correctly.

You're definitely part of the solution. Thank you, on behalf of your fellow citizens, for managing your money responsibly. But keep learning! As you probably already know, financial knowledge pays.

You are probably capable of bringing something extremely important to your relationships: financial stability. Most relationship problems arise out of differences over money. You have the capacity to make excellent financial decisions as long as you use your head, and you are probably capable of talking intelligently with your mate about those decisions. Just be patient, and remember that the vast majority of people (very sadly) don't know this stuff.

You might be interested to know that the national average score for American high school seniors in 2008 was 48.3%, down about 4% from last year. I don't have any information about the standard deviation, unfortunately.

Take The (Federal Reserve's) Financial Literacy Test

Your result for The Which Biblical Villain Are You Test...

King Nebuchadnezzar

You scored 55% Pride, 18% Envy, 100% Ambition, and 50% Deceitfulness!

You are King Nebuchadnezzar, the emperor of Babylon. You are part of a long tradition of Middle Eastern dictators. Like any good dictator, you possess the attributes of pride and ambition in good measure. Your ambitious nature drove you to conquer much of the Middle East, including the kingdom of Israel. You subsequently put the people of Israel into bondage. You also tend to be very direct with your friends and enemies alike. You prefer to tell people exactly what you're going to do and how you're going to do it. Your position in society and your imperial army give you the ability to do this with impunity. Unlike many Middle Eastern despots, you are a very good ruler and you happen to treat your own people quite well. You might be a biblical villain, but I'm sure you'd make a good dictator in the 21st century, if given the chance.

Take The Which Biblical Villain Are You Test
plural: (god)
The dedication of a father


right there

open that link

read the blurb

watch the video


try to be half the man
half the human

of that man

and the world will be a better place
plural: (Default)
Okies peoples

I know some of you live in Atlanta and I know that lots of you know someone who does.

I have a friend who needs to interview a resident of Atlanta
who owns a car which is 2005 or newer

In exchange for that individuals time
he will compensate then 50 (fifty) dollars.

If you meet that description
then send me an email at
with your contact info and I'll pass it on.

If you know someone who meets that description
please ask them if they would be willing to be interviewed
and if they say yes, then email me their contact info
at the email address above.

I cannot guarantee that you will be interviewed
as my friend is trying several different sources
but he has had no luck so far and he asked me
cause I'm one of those lived everywhere know everyone
type people.

help a plural out and get paid for doing so

that is all
plural: (god)
[a letter/response to her post]
[which was too long to comment with]
[but I thought I'd share with yall anyway]
[hopefully she shan't be overly upset]

[edit: if you haven't answered the poll posted in the entry before this one - quit slacking]

Yup. I'd suspect that you are an excellent bullshitter, however that is a sign of intelligence. Idiots can rarely thinks quickly or cleverly enough to bullshit well.



That's, right, I'm calling bullshit.

People see you as smart because you are. You are quick learner, and have an excellent ability to draw cognitive connections.

Sure you know stuff, and the measure of your intelligence isn't the stuff that you know. What you know is a function of your life, what you need to know and what you choose to know.

I don't know much about the first law of thermodynamics, I remember a vague overview of the laws of thermodynamics as a whole but more importantly I know where and how to find the answers should I need to. The simple reality is that our brains can only hold so much information, particularly a sad little damaged brain like mine.

The important thing is to understand the broad concepts, how they relate to each other and then how to find better answers when you need to.

Brilliance follows the old 80/20 rule, it is 80% of what you know results from spending 20% of your time at a library. *grin*

As you said, there is a difference between book smart and smart. You aren't lacking in intelligence, you are lacking in time spent with your nose in a history book.

That is simply a choice, although given how horrid the state of education in the world these days, it isn't entirely your fault, after all I am a lover of history despite the best efforts of a dozen or more history teachers trying to bore me to death.

As for my conversations with BB, not many people can or desire to keep up with us, even his wife H who is perfectly capable of holding her own when she desires to (as I am sure you are as well). She generally prefers to let us go back and forth and snipe from the sidelines.

So, you'll have someone to chat with and make fun of BB and I as we babbling on incessantly about some trivial distinction that really isn't relevant to the overall debate we are having.

As for standing there and looking pretty, well I'm good with that as well, although I'm sure it will mean that I get distracted and lose the argument, but I suppose that is probably good for me to taste the humility of mortals from time to time.

It aint no misconception.

You are hot.

I say so and I'm the plural.

They say so (cause I've threatened them with bodily harm).

I win.

As one of the worlds foremost experts on beauty of all sorts but particularly that of the female aspect, my opinion on the subject is entirely beyond contestation in any form save by your having a peer review journal article published.

Lastly, if the man who adores you loses his train of thought when you walk by, his eloquence trailing off into stumbles and mumbles of incoherency, does it really matter if you think you are hot or not?

Back to the smart thing:

Boggle requires smarts (full disclosure: I suck a boggle)

Debating the finer points of thermonuclear diplomacy requires knowledge.

The difference between the two?

You can teach knowledge.

Stumped? why be stumped?

There are thousands of things I don't know anything about, when they come up, I say "Hey, I don't know anything about that" and then start asking questions.

As Seneca said:

"If you don't know, ask. You will be a fool for the moment, but a wise man for the rest of your life."

Because of this, it is far more important in life to know "what you know" and "what you do not know", than the amount of knowledge you possess. Because if you know that you do not know, you have the opportunity to ask.

That said, I will never seek to, or allow another to make you feel less than simply because you do not have some piece of knowledge readily available.

Of course, if it is merely forgetfulness or you are having a blonde moment as opposed to a lack of knowledge, I do reserve the right to mock you relentlessly.

Smart is the ability
Intelligence is knowing how to use it
Knowledge is a life long and hopeless pursuit
Ignorance is intentionally avoiding understanding

Smarts are a gift
Intelligence must be trained
Knowledge is obtained
Ignorance is willfully pursued

I have zero doubts about your intellectual capacities being a match for my own, even if I have a little bit of a head start in the training/experience departments.

that is all

plural: (king)
[what can I say it is the Israeli national past time]

Ok so yeah, I'm singling someone out here
and being something a complete bastard by doing so
but it is a moral imperativae

There are five photographs of one woman
view them at your leisure
and answer the poll at the bottom of this post
[no slacking on the poll either]
[I'll be watching you]

All your base are belong to me (aka redhead hottie within) )

[Poll #1218379]

full disclosure:

The plural is smitten,
as some of you have already guessed
and so for you
and everyone else
consider this an introduction
plural: (bogie)
To me
My recent post was an internally clarifying event.

To a large degree, much of it was already known to me
but perhaps
it served to weave together different aspects
create a more unified theme.

I have long lived a life
forsaking the calm cool valleys
for the high peak and low chasms

I suppose when you've been where I've been
the lowest darkest chasm
doesn't seem so bad
if it is the risk
you must take
for a few minutes upon the highest peak

then it is so very worth it.

I see human society and its god
as a moderating force

preaching safety at the expense of greatness
ownership at the expense of exploration
contentment at the expense of inspiration

I do not want to get married to a woman who will love me for the rest of my life
I do not want to simply check that box and put away the list

rather I want to get marry a woman
who will expect me to make her fall madly in love with me
every single day for the rest of my life
and be committed to making me fall in love with her
every single day for the rest of her life

I want the challenge of waking up every morning
and thinking "How will I make her fall in love with me today?"

I want to be the man who succeeds at this task.

To me it seems there are two paths

that of a collector of life
and that of a rider of life

in the former, you collect symbols and trinkets
things to create emotional attachments to
things to store memories in
you possess life

in the latter you collect merely memories
chase dreams
ride the wave

forget the mousetrap
lets build a better mouse

The last post wasn't a question of good or evil
but rather the path and the methodology of doing either.

You can live the stagnant life and be evil
You can live the creative life and be good

The choice to do one or the other is entirely separate.

Sure, each has its temptations and pitfalls.

How easy it is to sit back on your safe porch and judge others,
laugh at their failures and call them ridiculous,
all while never even making the attempt yourself

Is that good? Is that evil? Something in between?

I suppose one can decide
to own things or to do things

sure there is always some overlap
but I would much rather
spend my life held rapt by the glories and challenges of life
be surrounded by pretty things
than live in a comfortable prison

I am reminded of a childhood game
where you grab a friend by the wrists
put your feet close together
lean back and spin around
as fast as you can

the blood rushes to your head
you feel lightheaded and giddy
then your hand slips
and without the counterbalance
you both fall
scraping knees and bruising elbows

but so what?

I want to love like that
I want to get up again and again
scraped elbows and bruised knees
and trust my hands to her once more

knowing full well that she will fail me
knowing full well that I will fail her
knowing that pain is a definite result
knowing that the pain will be ever so worth it


having loved like that once
I cannot imagine any other way
I cannot accept any other way

to believe
with my whole heart

that the juice is worth the squeeze.

So yes

Jun. 30th, 2008 04:01 pm
plural: (king)
I've been consumed with
some rather interesting thoughts
I thought I'd commission a poll.

[Poll #1213977]


that is what I thought...
plural: (whome)
There is a lovely story in Sanskrit

about a frog that is born in a well and stays in the well
and lives it entire life in the well

it has a world view that consists of that well

if you ask the frog
it is content, happy even

but what happens when you expand that world view however slightly?
once the frog is aware that more exists beyond the well
it is no longer content to stay within the well

the well once sufficient, once everything to that frog
is made insufficient by knowledge alone

the character of the well has not changed
it provides no less sustenance
it provides no less security
it provides no less pleasure
than it did previously
yet the well is less
through no fault of its own
but still
it remains less

think of the pet lizard
held in a glass aquarium
it has everything it needs
food, water, warmth
but still
it will risk literally life and limb
to explore beyond the glass walls
of the aquarium

why is this?

Why would the lizard, the frog so instinctively, so brashly rail against all biological constructs
to risk life and limb to escape the lush garden provided to it?

the answer is simple
however lush, however sufficient
the aquarium is a cage, a prison
and even the lowly lizard will instinctively seek freedom
and that is merely the response of a non-thinking creature

how much more so with one of us

a human

The Garden of Eden was not the Paradise
it was a prison with lush walls

No matter how lush the prison
no matter how perfect the construct
a human cannot remain in such a place
because while there is no suffering
there is no risk in such a place
there is also no hope

and to me
and to me

What fresh hell is this?

What was the Serpent's crime?

That devil's trick

One bite from the fruit of the tree of knowledge


and like that, it is gone

and even God with all his power
could not keep Eden in all its glory
from being reduced to a prison

but as Eden was a prison after consuming knowledge
and as like the well the essential character was unchanged

Then we can only know Eden was always a prison
and God sought to keep us there
in the dark, in the bliss that is ignorance

What better definition of oppression is there?

Than to keep someone imprisoned, and ignorant
That they will never realize the truth of their condition?

Before Eden there was only one sin


God is the plantation owner
who fears his slaves learning to read

God is the great white oppressor
limiting your mind to control your spirit

God is the petulant child
flushing his unruly pets down the drain
to live secret furtive lives in the sewer

So what then is the Serpent?

Corrupter? Betrayer? Liberator?

Sympathetic ear?

Remember well
that it was God who cast us out of Eden
yet we curse the Serpent for our exile

It was God who imprisoned us
yet we curse the Serpent for betraying us

and like our holy father before us
we act with petulance
irrationally seeking to go back to that safe place
we had before

to close our minds off
to refuse new knowledge
to retain our ignorance

and each of us
seeking to recreate god in our own image
seeking to recreate ourselves in gods image
repeat this process

We carve out little edens, prisons of contentment
four lush walls carved from the finest planks of denial

We stick our heads in the sand
Seeking to hold on to that bliss

God on one side telling you to accept, telling you to be content
The Serpent on the other, urging you seek, to strive, to find and not to yield

God says risk nothing, accept little and be glad for it
The Serpent shouts to risk everything, find passion and be challenged

The Serpent is the poem, a dream made flesh

All the potential of the world

Take away the names
what do we have?

Someone who wants to hold you back
Someone who wants to see you reach for your dreams

The first offers unreasonable caution, risk nothing to lose nothing
The latter offer unreasonable risk, risk everything to gain everything

The question becomes

Is it better to not try and not fail
to try and surely fail

I have tried
I have failed

I have been to Babylon
have tasted the waters of defeat

I have been to Eden
have tasted the fruit
of her tree of knowledge

not the apple full of seed
but the peach nestled
between those succulent thighs

at the core of knowledge
the pit of the peach if you will, is truth
and like the peach pit, truth is poisonous

It is better to try and fail
and from that to know pain
that it may define the joy
and deliver meaning

than to try nothing
and succeed at nothing
thereby accomplishing nothing
and be ignorant of your own misery.

it is this poison God fears
this light of truth
because the unspoken truth
is that his ever gilded lie
is rendered false by simple entropy

the only constant is that nothing remains constant
everything changes
everything grows or everything dies

The Serpent is honest but frightening
You have nothing, you can only seek something
you can never possess it, not entirely
but maybe
just maybe the pursuit is the joy of it
the wild ride
the passionate kiss
the embattled embrace of a long nights lovemaking

these are things that cannot be owned
can not be stored safe and secure
nay, each and every day
you must go out and obtain them fresh
for they cannot survive the second dawn

look at yourself
you know what you want
you know what you desire
but still you are afraid
still you shackle yourself to security

but love is in the leaping
I think you should jump

You can't have them both
He can't be both
and neither can I
neither will I.

Beauty, Passion, Lust,
Inspiration, Knowledge, Freedom

are not things to be possessed
to be locked in a box safely

they are raging torrents
waves to be ridden
your fingers begging for purchase
never quite able to hold on

That is your choice

The devil who loves you
The god who neglects you

but go ahead, be content
be secure
be safe

accumulate tokens and possessions
symbols of the happiness you once aspired to
convince yourself that if only god neglected you
a little bit less
it would be enough

lie to yourself
betray yourself
tell yourself
you don't want the raging torrent
you don't need the turbulent passion


read your dreams on those pages
to be lived out by hands other than yours
to be loved by hearts other than yours

the choice is yours
all I can do is love you regardless
and weep for what you could have been

Having experienced the rush of love unbridled
of passion unrelentingly breaching my soul
I cannot accept ordinary,
I cannot accept flaccid life
I cannot accept flaccid love
so I choose the Serpent

My soul cannot regain it innocence, its ignorance
I have seen too many high peaks to be contented with the plateau
seen too many dark chasms to be afraid of the valleys
so I choose the Serpent

Life is my addiction
Never will I stop seeking the next fix
and my children will be like gods
raised without the poison of God's fear
to be contemptuous of contentment

God soothes the soul
provides the peace
hush little child don't say a word
papa's going to buy you a mocking bird

God promises
stability without value
Love without passion
The safety of a gilded cage
from which you may sing

and sing well precious birdie
perhaps then you won't notice
that your heart is already broken

you fear your heart breaking
you are in denial

your heart is already broken
you just refuse to see it

but when the wind blows
the cradle will rock
and when the bough breaks
the cradle will fall
and down with come baby, cradle and all

The bible thumpers have it all wrong

It is the Serpent who is the purist.

God is the consumerist whore.

These are not the times of the Devil
Nay not at all, God wins this fight
and we are all lessened by it

Stories of sin? Lists of commandments?
Falsehood and misdirection
The only true sin remains the same


The same as it ever was
The same as it ever was

Look around us, the enlightenment is over
Peace, Tranquility, Security, Tyranny rule the day

God has won this round

Selling false security of material joys and limited dreams

You don't sell you soul for that IKEA sofa with the broad print stripes
you sell your soul for the dream of it.
trading all that you possess
for the security of a dream that can be easily met.

That is the path of God

Oppression, stagnation, contentment

Ignorance, surrender, hopelessness

If all that is true

What defense does the Serpent require?

Save perhaps to say

I am not God.
plural: (whome)
I've been struck
these past two days
the thought of buffy
the birth of his daughter

his reflections on the experience of childbirth
closely mirror the expectations I've long held


I don't think I've done anything so wicked yet
to deserve a daughter
more likely
I'll be cursed with sons just like me.


forget all of that


I had a date tonight

nothing special really
just a lovely lass
with a delightful ass

to be entirely honest
I was bored
not while she was sucking my cock granted
rather when other than that
she opened her mouth

I think
the only time I wasnt bored
was when
she was tossing my salad

who am i to judge
god only knows
I am far from an honest perfect man

I popped a load
on a far prettier face
than a malcontent like myself deserves

and now
home at last
I find myself feeling empty

why is it that
a man cannot be satisfied
with fulfilling his biological duty

should it not be enough
that his seed is spread?

it is
not enough

however much darwin may object
there is a part of me
that seeks desperately
for a woman worth my seed
an equal
a partner
a woman who can match my godliness
with a divinity of her own
and together we can create
children of a lesser god

fuck mortals
they are pathetic
susceptive to influence

my children
shall be gods
plural: (Default)
call me


I am a jackass

no, not like the damn movie

but anyway

as they say

Tastes Great!

Less Filling!

So harden the fuck up.

I just saw

Jun. 25th, 2008 11:31 am
plural: (Default)
the first mesquito
of the summer

fucker is going down
plural: (Default)
I had a most interesting evening last night.
It has been a while since I had a good night
of men behaving badly


I've been spending a lot of time thinking about relationships lately
primarily other peoples but also my own

it occurs to me how much we promise and how much we expect
of things that are completely out of our control

and those things which are in our control
those things which we can promise or should expect
we take for granted or ignore the value of

take money for example
there is no such thing as enough money not for guarantees anyway
although there can easily be enough money to live a comfortable and fulfilled life
[that takes far less than you would think]

I've lived a life which on average is far more prosperous and luxurious
with so many more choices that most of you would ever honestly see yourselves obtaining

imagine if you would
going without a job for seven years

how many of you would be travelling the world?
how many of you would be enjoying your lives?

probably not many

how many of you would be hungry?
how many of you would be homeless?

probably most.

Now granted, I was doing projects earning money
but while some of those ventures were quite profitable
primarily the goal was to stay productive and provide drinking/play money
not to provide my basic essentials

I've had years which were highly profitable
and I've had years in which I lost more money
than most of you will make in 20 years of working

the last two years have been pretty rough, that too shall pass

life is a cycle and I've been through the cycle of wealth and poverty
many many times, although each time it seems
I'm more rich at the top of the cycle and less poor at the bottom of the cycle

which I suppose means progress over all

of course, the vast majority of my "wealth" is all on paper, contracts and digital 1s & 0s
perhaps that is as it should be after all I am a young man without a family of my own
so I don't really need to access large cash flows and my monthly nut can remain quite small

I was talking with a dear friend today and he mentioned that one of his favorite things about me
is that while I earn an income which would provide most anything I desire I still drive the same 12 year old toyota

granted I am thinking of replacing it in the next year or so but even still I shant get anything extravagant
I was thinking that maybe I'd drop twenty grand and get a new honda civic
but if I know myself I'll probably drop about half that on a used one and be quite content

that isn't to say I'm a cheap bastard because any of you who read this
especially any of you who have met me know that I have little compunction spending money
I just choose to spend it on different things

I spend my money doing things preferrably with people I love
not on acquiring shit I don't need
that will need to be replace with other shit I don't need in a few years

I went out to dinner with a friend and his wife the other night
and at the moment I am feeling incredibly tight cash flow wise
although that will ease up nicely on the 20th of June
so pretty much I am in hunker down and get there mode

but regardless of the truth of the situation
I was feeling the pinch of being tight on cash
so I asked him for advice on managing cash flow

he looked at me like I was an alien

and said, do not mistake the fact that you are tight right now
for a problem or lack of skill in managing your cash flow
I've known you for nearly a decade and
I've seen very few people manage as well as you do.

which did much to ease my mind.

ok well
this post has gotten well away from me
and strayed too far from the relationship questions thoughts
I had intended to share
and into the realm of cash flow concerns
I'm going to abort it now
and come back at another time
when my brain is on the right track

be well

love me
plural: (Default)
I've spent
the entire day
thinking about a peach

I devoured a nectarine
but while quite delicious
it just didn't
sate my craving

it has been
most distracting
envisioning the taste
of that
succulent peach

It is now 10 pm
and I've not gotten nearly enough
work done today

this may be a late night.
plural: (bowler)
Is it possible
that I am actually growing up?

becoming less shallow
at least
if not any less foolish

I still find myself aspiring to be a jackass
not that sort
not like in that inane movie

of the romantic variety
one who refuses to settle
for a love less than spectacular

who seeks daily passion
nightly fireworks
and refuses to accept
the common wisdom that
such things fade

I think my earlier post
with regard to quixotic
wasn't entirely on the money

not that I don't have the tendencies
a leaning in that direction
I think rather
that ever since Charlie died

I've been looking for the inspiration
not only to feel as I did with her
but to act as I did towards her
to be the man I was with her

I've always been a passionate man
a hopeless romantic
it pervades my being
even when I am my most cynical

but she inspired me
her smiled encouraged me
her laugh lifted me off the ground

so that so much of my thoughts
were consumed with creating opportunities
for joy and affection between us

not that such were needed

I would spend days
happily planning out
every last detail of a date
for any special occasion

all of my life
I have pursued perfection
in some form or another

but since she died
I have rarely done so
in my romantic life

part of this is my fault
part of this is that of the other lasses

Charlie had an appreciation for the divine
an eye for beauty, a mind for meaning
and appreciated every gesture
from the most grand to most humble

I find it sad, how many women
choose to complain and nag
when their man fails to live up to their expectations
their desires

when it is entirely the wrong approach

You want to bring out the best in your man
don't criticize him, and crush his spirit
we men, for however tough an exterior
are particularly fragile when it comes to the opinion
our lovers hold of us

Rather praise him
even for petty little things
never miss an excuse to reward
the slightest thoughtfulness

and you will see
that he will rise to the occasion

we men, however secure in ourselves we may or may not be
crave the respect and adoration of our women
so much so that nothing
will we not attempt to receive it

like a dog, pressing its nose against the glass
eager for a pat on the head

and when you give it to us
lavish us with that adoration, that respect
it makes us feel like men
good solid worthwhile men

and that we all crave

once you have demonstrated
that we can get that need met
that we can obtain that affection
through a positive channel

we will strive to repeat it
we will make a point of earning additional praise
if we can clearly see the way

There is an old joke

If you wash the dishes
and a woman was not there to see it
did it actually happen?

Women often talk and feel like they are under appreciated
but as often as not, they are just as guilty

I know, I know
why should you praise your man
for doing what is simply expected?

Doing the dishes is just something that has to be done
Why should you praise him for doing so

Two reasons

One, because as far too many women know
Helping out around the house seems like no big deal
until he isn't doing it

Two, because you want him
to be overjoyed and insistent
in his attempts to demonstrate his affection

Because, that makes you feel loved.

When you nag a man, you crush his spirit
and create a negative association
about whatever you want him to do.
a resentment towards doing so

Not to mention, that if he isn't feeling loved
Isn't receiving positive attention
he will seek negative attention

in the end, child psychology is really the most human psychology
because children are simply people without walls to hide behind

All of us, male or female, young or old
need attention from the ones we love
if we can't get positive reaffirmation from those we love
we will seek out negative reaffirmation

so the question becomes
what is more pleasant for you

whispering sweet nothings in your lovers ear
to inspire him to reach further affections


getting angry and upset, yelling and screaming at him

because, those are your only options

either choice provide feed the same need
either option reaffirms that you love him

but more importantly

it also reaffirms whatever behavior created the reaction
confirms in his mind that whatever behavior he did
is a dependable way to get the reassurances he needs

so which would you rather create
a cycle of positive loving behavior
or a spiral of negative acting out behavior

and lastly
if he fails to rise to the occasion
if he doesn't seek your affections
then you'd better ask yourself

if you are willing to accept things as they are
darling, it is the best they will ever get.

if you are asking yourself that question
chances are, you desire far more passion
than your relationship will ever provide

as some of you might have guessed
I'm in something of a pickle at the moment
I've fallen for a woman (and she with me)
engaged to someone else

No, it wasn't intentional
No, we didn't see it coming
Yes I realize it is against all the rules
Yes I realize it is terribly foolish

but I really do not care
as we have decided to remain as friends
for the time being, perhaps even forever

that it is best for her to give her fiancee
the chance to rise to the occasion
the opportunity to resuscitate their relationship

but it has inspired me
to think on the subject of love
and relationships

The above is not my realization
not my thoughts
but a lesson I learned from Charlie

To quite literally kill them with affection
and in my relationships
it has made
all the difference
plural: (Default)


As a 1930s husband, I am
Very Superior

Take the test!

plural: (king)
I just had to call you, I had to hear your voice
And tell you I still love you we still have a choice
Youre sewn into the fabric, the pieces of my life
And I just cant remember why we said goodbye

You had me at hello
and every moment in between
however much I tried to deny it
to myself in the beginning

but I
grasped only ghosts
figments of my heart

wisps of dreams
cupped in my hands
with adoring intent
only to slither through my fingers

precious as they are elusive
drops of jupiter
drops of mercury


bright stars of desire
burning through my flesh

irresistible attraction
meets unmovable reality
in our secret life

the wind blows off the bow
carrying soft voices

amo, amare, amavi, amatum

to love

cieo, ciere, civi, citum

to arouse

teneo, tenere, tenui, tentus

to hold

foveo, fovere, fovi, fotus

to cherish

the chant of the neverborn
the chant of the neverwas

dreams unrequited
reports unwritten
laughter unheard
ghosts of little feet
patter through my mind

princes and princesses
the king and queen
of our secret life

despite my longing
and all of this is
as it should be
honor is upheld
justice is restored

like a thief in the night
like a smile while in mourning
the transgression was mine
with each breath of elation
smuggled into my heart

yet the reckoning comes
righteous as it ever was
certain as it never was
it struck my heart with a deadly force
it said this heart
it is not yours

You always said I was a liar
But we burn like a house on fire...
No matter what, you know that to be true.

and that is my crime
jealousy, envy
but above all

the gall, the audicity
to dare to hope
that which I could not even think

an optimist looks at the glass
and sees that it is half full
the pessimist sees the glass half empty

I wonder why the glass can not always be brimming over the top
and you lament that it is not completely empty yet
leaving me only to pine despite my foolishness

I suppose this is my due
The vengence of the lord
If I had spared her the truth
given her the kindness of the lie

perhaps it would be different
but now, sitting here
I cannot imagine any words more cruel
than hearing you say that you love me

however desperately
I've yearned to hear it
I've yearned to say it
my tongue bleeds from the repeated bites of my cowardliness

Say that you love him
Say that he moves you
Say anything but this
Show me the kindness I was unable to dispense
all those years ago

lie to me
decieve me
betray me
do anything at all
just leave me that empty cloak of denial

for rejection is ever so much sweeter than this

I hear your words
believe them to be just
to be honorable
but still, misguided

not that I have any right
not that I have any standing
to say such things to you

what am I but a foolish man
a boy with a dream
who has no right to you
let alone to your love

is love enough
to make such a bold claim
does love in and of itself
give us the right to speak

my mind wishes
that standing up and objecting at your wedding
was half as romantic in real life
as it appears in the movies

instead of being desperate
and pathetically behind the curve

of course with you
I've always been behind the curve
the path you are on, set so many years ago

I never expected
to be able to change your course
at so late a date
against all reason
I had hoped.

So what now?

Suddenly the night has grown colder
the god of love, preparing to depart
Alexandra hoisted on his shoulder
they slip between the sentries of the heart

I remain

to belong at last to Babylon
plural: (king)
this evening I went
to a charity event

a political cabaret

my dear sister
was one of the organizers
and the cause was to support
bringing theatre professionals
to public schools

it was great fun
and five hundred bucks a ticket
for a good cause
was easily made up
by the pitchers of cosmos they plied me with

it marks the second time
I've seen a US congressman
and a transsexual stripper
on the same stage

the primary difference
is that this time
I wasn't sworn to secrecy

I had the pleasure of being dragged on stage
to introduce Tom Skerrit and the govenor of the state
[who despite the rumors, I did not sleep with her]
[although I did vote for her, three or four times]

the dutiful brother that I am
I stayed to help my sister and her crew
clean up

that isn't exactly true

cleaning up entailed
stacking about a hundred chairs

swing dancing
with half a dozen lovelies

and drinking another pitcher
of cosmos

there is a young lady
I've been most intrigued with of late
a young lass I've no right to be so enamored of

but I foolishly thought
I could distract myself

so tonight
I drank


then I danced
with a brunette and a blonde
both quite exquisite

and together
quite determined to find out
if I was indeed
hung like a light switch in a doll house
of if I was just bragging

it is amazing
how bragging about how inept you are in bed
only seems to encourage women
to find out if you were lying

I made the false excuse
as one of the two was my sisters assistant
and took my leave

I thought I was free and clear
and then the redhead approached

we danced
and she smelled amazing
but however aroused I got
I could only think
how close of a substitute she was
for someone else

so I used the excuse
of my mother's cancer
and her living with me
to beg off politely

of course
I didn't realize my motivation
until that moment

with her breast pressed against me
the smell of her in my nostrils
her lips hovering before mine

why I was declining
and even now
I cannot believe that I did

what the hell was I thinking
turning down such a luscious lass
such a precious ass

however much I lusted
my mind was elsewhere
someplace I had no right to be
thinking thoughts most inappropriate

what a fool am I

the blonde and the brunette
were cute
good for at least four or five hours
of utterly perverted sex

but the redhead



I could have eaten that peach for hours

but somehow
despite the obvious erection in my pants
my mind was elsewhere
my lust was elsewhere

someplace it shouldn't be
but there it was

and now
drinking from the pitcher of cosmos
that was sent home with me

sitting here alone
thinking over the three lovely lasses
that I walked away from

I do not understand it
but I do not regret it either

think what you will
I'm going to get drunk.
plural: (Default)
A while back one of you, I'm thinking it was [ profile] octal or [ profile] faustin but I can't recall

Posted a link to an incredibly swank hotel in Oman or Yemen.

I'm trying to find that particular company's website.

If you recall posting about it, do help me out with a link or the name of the hotel.

It would be most appreciated.

nevermind, my stunning powers of recollection
allowed me to remember the name of the hotel
the chain operates in Burma
and I was able to locate their website
with a simple google search.

If you're curious:
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